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Varadkar Joins The Yellow Vests

Updated: Apr 13, 2021


Leo Varadkar yesterday.


In an astonishing development, Ireland's Taoiseach for Life Leo Varadkar has joined the Yellow Vest movement.


Speaking exclusively to The Covid Chronicle he said "I've had it with party politics. It's all a load of nonsense, just telling lies and screwing people over. I just want the party and not the politics. It's a lot more fun being in The Yellow Vests than being in Fine Gael, and yellow suits me much better as a colour than blue does".


Varadkar, who had earlier consumed several bottles of the popular beverage Malibu, seemed keen to get his message across to the Irish people, but more especially to diminutive Australian songstress Kylie Minogue. "She never wrote back to me", he sobbed, referring to the time he sent an official government invitation to the pop star to joiin him for a lavish banquet at the Taoiseach's Palace in the Phoenix Park. "Maybe now she'll listen".


The Fine Gael leader, who had been playing a CD of Ms. Minogue's greatest hits on repeat, jumped up quite suddenly when the song "Spinning Around" came on and began to sing along while attempting to simultaneously dance to the tune.


"I'm spinning around, move out of my way, I know you're feeling me 'cause you like it like this", said the Taoiseach, moving his hands provocatively up and down over his body while spinning dangerously in the middle of the floor.


However, within a few moments he needed to sit back down. "I feel a bit sick now", he said.


An emotional Varadkar, who had previously been seen as one of Ireland's most conservative politicians and a firm advocate of lockdowns, continued, "It's not just the drink talking. This is who I really am. You're a good bloke, you really are. Do you have any more Malibu?"


The Taoiseach became notably more subdued during "Je Ne Sais Pas Pourquoi", although his mood changed to a more playful one when "Can't Get You Out of My Head" came on.


During this song, he suggested it might be a good idea to dance around wearing only his new yellow vest. At that point we decided to terminate the interview.

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