Van Morisson yesterday.
Grumpy Norn Iron song and dance man Van Morrison is set to launch a massive legal action against a well known death serum manufacturer.
Morrison (pictured) believes that leading German poisons company AstralZenicol has stolen their name from his best selling 1968 CD 'Astral Zenicol'.
Speaking through an interpreter, Morrison said, "Enough is enough. I'm fed up with people taking advantage of my good nature and my clever way with words. Microsoft did the same in the 80s. Their Windows operating system was clearly named after my jolly ditty 'Cleaning Windows'.
However, AstralZenicol are likely to contest Morrison's action. Company CEO Astrid Zenicol said, "This is clearly a coincidence. You can't copyright commonly used words and phrases. To be honest, I'd never even heard of this guy, let alone any hippy-dippy albums he might have made long ago in the past". Speaking at the launch of her company's 'Mondance' range of constipation remedies, she continued, "Manufacturing poisons is a time consuming job, you don't even have time to listen to good music, let alone boring old stuff like his."
AstralZenicol is no stranger to controversy, with the company's Brown Eyed Girl cosmetic division being forced to close last year due to worldwide reports of facial disfigurement in people who used their products. However, no link has ever been proven and most of those affected probably had pre-existing conditions.
Morrison, who is also the owner of the UKs largest supermarket chain, is well know for engaging in litigation. In 1975 he famously took fellow folk miserabilist Bob Dylan to court for "looking at him kind of funny", and in the 1990s he successfully sued New Labour favourites D-Ream for making false claims with their annoying hit 'Things Can Only Get Better'.
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