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Friends Reunited

Updated: Apr 13, 2021


Fauci and Sars-CoV-2 yesterday.


In a scene reminiscent of Mary Shelley's award-winning 1931 film Frankenstein, pint-sized physician and New World Order enthusiast Dr. Anthony Fauci was yesterday reuinited with with his controversial creation Sars-CoV-2.


The reunion (pictured above) took place as part of a 'This is Your Life' style event arranged by Fauci's old friend Klaus Schwab to mark the diminutive doctor's 127th birthday. A clearly moved Fauci was, for once, at a loss for words.


The tiny scientist had believed he was about to give a press conference encouraging people to wear multiple plastic bags over their heads to better protect against viral transmission, when portly dystopian Schwab emerged from the crowd carrying a big red book. Fauci later joked, "I was about to run. I thought Kluas was somebody form Interpol with a list of all my crimes against humanity!"


The event was briefly interrupted when what appeared to be a holographic projection of deceased PCR inventor Kary Mullis began shouting obscenities and accusations of fraud in the direction of the bijou boffin. However, Fauci later laughed this off as "Kary up to his old tricks, even from beyond the grave! Me and him were great friends really."


Fauci, previously best known for his role as Joe Pesci in dad-favourite gangster flick Goodfellas, invented Sars-CoV-2 in his laboratory in Wuhan, China, back in 2017, using egghead technology know as 'gain of function mutation'. Sadly, the two have been seperated ever since because, in Fauci's words, "it would have looked bad."


Sars-CoV-2 wasn't the only figure from the miniscule medic's past in attendance yesterday. Other VIP guests included George Bush, Dolly Parton, George Soros, former college roommate Bill Gates, and BBC disinformation reporter Marianna Spring.

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